How To Tear Down The Wall That Creates Self-Sabotage

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Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby said, “Self-sabotage is when we say we want something and then go about making sure it doesn’t happen.”  What many people seem to forget is how powerful they are and that their thoughts, words and subsequent actions determine what unfolds in their life. As such, many people build walls that they hide behind. They build walls to keep other people out. Those same walls also keep them trapped inside…a cycle of self-sabotage and unfortunately, for many people this has become a way of life. Getting lost within yourself hinders growth and it certainly does not allow others to get to know the REAL you.

Building walls to confine yourself is also a sure-fire way to live a small life. If you are pushing all your gifts and talents deep down inside of you for fear of rejection, you rob the world of knowing how amazing you really are. Yes, you may think of it as a coping mechanism that will somehow ‘protect’ you from ‘perceived pain’, but it will end up destroying you from the inside out if not attended to.

Maybe it’s time to tear down all those walls you have spent so much time building.  

 Maybe it’s time to FINALLY take a chance on YOU, a chance on really living…. without the walls.  

 Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other

people won’t feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of
God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

-Marianne Williamson

Get to know YOU on a whole other level. Pay attention. Forget all the reasons why you did (or didn’t do) something or why you even built those walls to begin with. Start with paying more attention to your actions so you can understand yourself better. Then, ask yourself: “What did I do there?” and “What was driving it?” Was it fear, the need to be in control (even if that control is related to making things fail), the need for excitement through conflict, or the desire for attention through sympathy? Allow your inner voice to guide you down a path of transformation. You built those walls, so you can certainly tear them down when you are ready.

Stop trying to do everything ‘perfect.’ If you are doing your BEST, let that be the benchmark. Give up the need to be your own worst critic. Rest in the truth that you are an extension of Source (God, The Universe), the Source that created every living thing including YOU, so essentially you are already perfect. Know that you are overflowing with amazing-ness because YOU are! Be willing to trust yourself and release the need to please others. Just simply do your best. Start tearing down the walls you have built brick by brick (thought by thought). Self-sabotage is a REAL THING – don’t make it a way of life. Strive to go beyond that. Tear it down!

 Bless Up,

Coach Kerri

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