Sometimes we may feel like the world is caving in around us and we lack the capacity to climb out of the cave. We get so focused on the fact that the walls are coming in that we ignore the rope hanging right there, giving us a chance to escape. The girls trip was just what they all needed to escape the harsh realities of their life. A chance to embrace the positivity and pleasure of what life their life is and can be. It was an opportunity to let go of the stress and self-loathing baggage that impedes on one’s mindset flustering up negative self-worth. Leaving the boundaries of the city, embracing a space that was new to them despite the feeling that they may be called out or hurt for existing in spaces that were not accepting of them for being womxn of color.
To enter a space where you know that everyone is staring at you, but they all stood their ground and took up space that they rightfully should. They engaged in joy and love with and for one another, and it was a sight to see. I can’t speak for the experience of trans womxn, but from what has been shared with me is that some live in constant fear that they may not pass. That they will be clocked by onlookers making obscene statements and in some cases they may be hurt physically. I know that this experience is not far fetched particularly living at the intersection of being a person of color and a person of trans experience. The amount of hate crimes towards folks who hold these identities continues to grow within the US, and that fear that they hold is sad but, unfortunately, necessary for survival.
I am personally an Elektra stan because I mean she is phenomenal, and though her actions are sometimes questionable, she is also fierce, smart and loving. She was on her mother shit this episode and I loved every bit of it. She brought everyone to a beautiful space, paid for everything and gave Blanca the extra attention that she needed. Letting Blanca know that no matter what she will always be her mother, which speaks to the power, sustainability and need of chosen families, particularly in the queer community. Elektra continued to drop gems when she said,“They hate us because of what it means to love us,” I felt that. Living in a cis heteronormative transphobic white society that tries to tell you anything other than the “norm” is wrong creates this belief that your love cannot be fluid. That if you love or are someone who does not fit the “standard” then society will ostracize you, make fun of you, and cause copious amount of psychological pain.
It was beautiful that Adrian saw Blanca as her authentic self. He is also super fine and Blanca deserves it all. Blanca is courageous because she lives in her truth, and I admire folks that live their truth everyday particularly in a society that applauds curated displays of falsehood. Blanca took a chance and did not let fear set in, and I could not be more proud considering she ain’t had a boo in forever. Not saying that relationships are tied to happiness, but it is always nice to feel wanted and seen.
It is natural to experience loneliness, a lack of self-acceptance and fear, but what POSE shows is that the people who got you will always have you no matter what. It shows that it is ok to have your feelings and sit in them for a while, but you will have to move out of them because everything changes, and you have the power to incite change for yourself and those around you.
Cover photo: FX