Love Walter: Broke or Broken-hearted?

Love Walter

Dear Walter, 

We are constantly having money issues. And I’m wondering if this is just a phase. So my question:  how important are finances in a relationship?

—Money Moves

Dear Money Moves, 

Once upon a time I used to date a guy who lived in a hotel. I slept all day, drank all night, and fucked daily. It’s all so fun when it’s fleeting. Flood my guts in this ghetto hotel. At least it’s not a motel.

As bland as this room was, it became my safe haven until he grew tired of me. Then I’ll  drift off to the next locale, passing the time until we could do it again. Could you imagine catching me while I’m sleeping in a sleeping bag near you?

Oh, the perils of an unconventional lifestyle where a dollar earned is never easy. And yet so easily spent—the mark of every artist. I guess, ain’t nothin’ going on but the rent. Even if I spent it all on a Saturday night.

But something had to change. I couldn’t produce my best writing, obsessing over money.

As I reclined in the bathtub, I was finally alone with my thoughts. The glow of three flickering candles kept me company. The soothing sounds of Lana Del Rey filled the room like a designer fragrance. My safety net lost its netting. We were broke again. As the lesson repeated, good finances were essential to any relationship’s success. I weigh the wine in my mind. Should we skip meals or spread them out?

The road to skinny won’t need the fat sucked out.

Our hotel holiday came to an end. Our regular romps were free and carefree. But there is only so much fucking to pass the time. Sometimes, I’d rather have the wine.

As I rolled around the tub, the bubbles barely covered my belly. But I couldn’t stomach more stress.

I escaped the tub and went back to work. And that was the best decision I made. My finances have improved and so have my relationships.



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