Love Walter:  I’ll Never Tell/ Let’s Get it On

Love Walter

Dear Walter, 

I have some people that I know that are always in my personal business. It’s becoming annoying. They are always asking me questions. First my dating life and now they are even questioning me about my sexuality. I don’t know what to do.

—Rumor Mill

Dear Rumor Mill, 

I too had people who were close to me, at least in proximity, who wanted to get closer. Many have tried and failed. They’ll ask but I’ll never tell. But that doesn’t me something shouldn’t be said about those those nosey people in our lives.

We live in an environment where you have to pay to play for everything. One tryst can give you a cyst. We piss off our partners with reckless behavior. But letting the odds be in our favor will turn your relationship into the Hunger Games.

I guess I’m living in La La Land, where you shake your ass for cold hard cash. I’m in my own personal dream land, traveling deep like Candy Land.

It’s amazing how we let the ones we love the most take us for granted. We go from fantastic to frantic, masquerading as romantic.

Someone accused me of moving around homes like musical chairs, to get fucked in dark holes. Well, that was nasty—rude and reductive. That sounds like advice from a pudgy queen playing Game of Thrones.

If I’m spreading my legs to the music of my heart, then let me spread eagle to Mariah Carey. Let them lie on top of me to her greatest hits. Light candles and grab the wine. Make it a night I’ll forget.

Or I’ll have another broken bad boy with two thrusts and two outfits. Could my dreams be tucked between my thighs? Would you stop bothering me if he did all those things to me.

Let these eyes connect with a president-elect where whatever I do is elevated to matters of national security. Because clearly what I’m doing is your business. Let me take in your insecurity like the state of the union. It could be our reunion. Watch him fuck me like I got ass shots until I pass out.

Perhaps, you should tell them something like that. Or you can just ignore them. They will get the hint — one day.



Love Walter:  Let’s Get it On

Hey Walter,

How do you feel about sex in public?

—Public Affair

Dear Public Affair, 

I interviewed an anonymous reader about it. And here were my findings.

It was a night to remember in Rochester, New York. Where his proclivity for public sex led him to the restroom of a bus station. Gangbanging challenged more than a gag reflex.

A den of iniquity where more people got off without anyone paying for dinner. It started at the urinal.

“He had his BBC out and I got right on my knees,” he texted.

“And the others joined in?”

“Yes Sir, 2 more black alphas, the 2 white guys jacked off in my face. I was drenched in cum.”

Gang banging intrigued me, the idea of all those people lined up sharing their body parts riveted me. The closest I’ve ever been to a gangbang was having sex while porn was on. I felt compelled to mirror what happened on tv. It culminated to the four us cumming together in unison.

How does one just go out and have a gang bang?

“I’ve been [submissive] to black alphas since 20.”

“You must have been exhausted. After they came, what happened next?” I texted

“I thanked the black alphas for using me, they laughed and walked out. I’m never too tired for BBC.”

“So you cleaned up in the sink?”

“I tried, but I was a mess, cum in my hair, on my shirt, dripping out my ass.”

In the age of AIDS, reenacting a porn scene in public and without protection can put you in a precarious position. But Prep and condom use can take the force out the big disease with a small name.

When approached with something new why do we think about the things that scare us the most?

I’m not advocating that you go gangbang today. But could you imagine the experience without judgment?

I have a recurring fantasy where I’m manhandled and fucked hard by two or four guys. It would have to be an even number, making me the center of attention. That fantasy lingered in my mind like a memory. Fear of getting raped and robbed kept me grounded.

Once we examine our fears could we then fly free?

The other day I watched a video of this white guy blindfolded in a hotel—guys entered and fucked him—depositing their essence inside him.

An act like that took planning, and for free. I’m sure it cost more than an ad on Craigslist.

But, would it be worth it? Now that’s a question only you can answer.



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